Friday, 20 July 2012

Cravings X (Josh)


X - Josh

Leading felt good.  Josh wasn’t sure why exactly, or how he had come to be in such a position in the first place, but it felt right, it felt good.  In a strange way it actually took a bit of the edge off the night, like he could face it better if he was performing some sort of role.  As long as he was the ‘fearless leader’ he really could be fearless, or as close to it as was possible in such circumstances.

In reality, of course, that was pretty far from actually being fearless.  If he were to speak about how he felt as they made they way back through the streets of granite tenements, trying to find a way around past the blockage, he would have to have admitted that he was terrified.  How else could you feel in the fog, when you know that any building might contain monsters, rivers of blood or flashbacks to an horrific past?  How else could you feel when you had no idea where you were going, how you were going to get there or when the nightmare might end?

Yes, Real Josh was terrified, but Leader Josh was stable, self assured and able to keep a clear head despite all he had seen, ignoring the whimpers in the back of his mind.

He led their small party back they way they had come initially, trying to distance them from the horrible sculpture of metal and flesh which had barred their passage towards the city centre.  Eventually, however, he had taken a turning to the right and began to lead them around the course of a few blocks back in the same direction, towards where the orange glow of the city would have been waiting, had this been any other night.

The first street he had tried had been much like the first, blocked by a wall of rusted appliances and gently pulsating meat.  The sight of it, somehow worse than the first one, almost made him sick, but he held himself together for the sake of Paige and Charlie, who looked to him for security.  Only when he was looking away from them, leading them once more back the way they had come, did he allow himself to show any of what he was really feeling, the pale, hollow revulsion of it all; the terror.

The next street they tried turned out to be the same, and the next and the next one after that.  Josh grew increasingly frustrated as he backtracked, trying to find other ways around, utilising all his knowledge of back alleys and side-streets gained from a misspent youth he ought still to be living, rather than playing the starring role in a game of follow the leader.  Eventually, after leaving the sixth wall he came to a halt in the middle of the street and ran his fingers through his short, messy hair, tugging slightly as he went.

“I’m running out of ideas,” he admitted as the others stopped beside him, “I’m not sure where to go next.

“There are a million ways to the city centre,” Paige said.  It sounded like she was trying to be soothing, but there was an edge to her voice that told too much of what she was really feeling for it to be effective.  “Surely one of them must be open.”

“You would think that, but… I don’t know.  Something doesn’t want us to get any further,”

“Or maybe it just wants us to go a certain way?”  Charlie suggested.

“And what way would that be?” Josh asked, looking down at the odd little boy.

Charlie turned around, almost seemed to sniff the air, then pointed down a narrow side street running along the edge of a deserted factory.  The red brick of an enormous chimney was still visible through the fog a little way further along.

“Why that way?”

“I don’t know,” the boy replied, “but I’m pretty sure that’s the way to go.”

Josh stared into the swirling fog, trying in vain to see past it to whatever awaited them in that claustrophobic street.  He shook his head for a moment, then stopped, closed his eyes and nodded.

“It’s the only plan we have,” he said.

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